I'm dying. I woke up this morning with red spots all over my body. Now its spreading. I slept for a long while this afternoon after taking 4 pills-all of them cause drowsiness. The doctor doesn seem to think anything is wrong with me. Sigh but I'm going back there every week! Something has to be wrong. So today unfortunately was a really unproductive day having to put up with a heavy head and stinging pains all over my body while studying for the term exams. I want to die.

You would have noticed, that recently I have avoided writing about things personal. Not because I don't want to, but rather because things have not been good and my mind simply refuses to vent. After the whole depression bit, I've learnt that writing about things that don't go well does not necessarily make anything better. For me all it does is reinforce all negativity in me giving me further chance to wallow in self pity. The week has been tiring. Me being sick just makes everything worse. I can never fully recover. I wonder if I'm infected by some deadly disease since my body is so weak. I really hope that's the case.
Fei got diagnosed with Leukaemia on Friday. I'm worried as hell. But I really wouldn mind if it was me.